Nov 05 2014 - 07:54

8 Things To Do To Parliament

8 Things To Do To Parliament Lebanon, news ,lbci ,أخبار Parliament,Things,
8 Things To Do To Parliament
Lebanon News
"Democracy is beautiful in theory; in practice it is a fallacy." - Benito Mussolini

By 2017, the year in which the term of this parliament's mandate ends, 8 years would have passed since the Lebanese people last cast their vote.            

8 years
. You think it’s a joke, I think it’s a joke, we all think it’s a joke.                

But the abuse of democracy is no laughing matter.                   

Following today’s extension of the parliaments mandate for the second time in a row, we are only left with memories of what was once a civil right: voting.            

The current parliament was elected in 2009 and extended its mandate in May of last year citing the security situation for a reason. Today, history repeated itself.                

For a list of Parliament’s achievements thus far click here, but seriously good luck navigating that website or trying to seek further information on the laws that were passed during the 2009-2014 (and counting) mandate.                 

As for a list of how we can better utilize parliament, given how totally inapt it is, check these out.          

1. Open Bar!                    
Since we can really set our hopes aside on ever having serious legislation when it comes to lawmaking in the country, we might as well ask that the space used by MPs in Nejmeh Square be turned into an exclusive males-only club.

Oh wait, there appears to be a woman (or two) in there somewhere... If you do spot them, please refer to number 3.     

2. Acting workshops
Yeah, sure, some voiced rejection to the extension of the mandate, but let’s see their words supported by action. Hint: It’s called a resignation. Until then the aspiring actor within us all will be taking notes. 

3. Fashion police             
If all else fails, we can turn to our women at parliament. Surely, what has been dubbed the “fairer sex” would have more empathy to the needs of the people...or not.
But hey! At least we can sit back and admire their impeccable sense of style, learning a few fashion tricks along the way.     


4. Learn the art of snapping selfies             
Our lawmakers are really good at that!

5. Alms for the poor              
Or visas! You know the old Lebanese saying “the longer you stand, the taller you grow”?  Given how things are going, it seems we will be taking standing to a whole new level, be it on the roads begging, or before embassies in hopes of one day receiving that the ever elusive Visa. After all lawmakers have taught us best when it comes to standing up to (read: kneeling down before) others.   


6. Learn Machiavellian
With "Games of Thrones" being the thing, we can take up Machiavellian courtesy of our politicians and give up on learning Dothraki, or anything else for that matter! 

7. Take up paleontology
Whoever thought dinosaurs were extinct clearly never visited Lebanon's excavation (read: political) scene, also known as Nejmeh Square. A course in Neanderthal studies is also being offered, courtesy of MP Nicolas Fattouch.   

8. But here’s my all-time favorite.. but that might just be the “crazy” in me

Remember, remember the fifth of November,
The gunpowder, treason and plot,
I know of no reason
Why gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot.

Nadine Mazloum is currently a freelance editor and news producer. She received her Honors in Communication Arts (Media Production) from The University of Western Sydney in 2008
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